Acamedia

New media begets new behaviors. Technology transforms how we perform and think. As my brain turns into a CPU, a mental search history reveals my most recent queries: How many passwords can the human brain remember in a lifetime? Will there ever again be a moment of uninterrupted work? Aren’t all LOLs silent? Why did the research that refuted multi-tasking take so long to emerge? Were researchers multi-tasking? If a selfie continually captures my double chin, will I become selfie-conscious? 

These are the terms and conditions of our digital days.

Academia is media-driven. The classroom is connected. Donald Norman asks, “How have we increased memory, thought, and reasoning? By the invention of external aids: It is things that make us smart.” [1] Laptops are long-term learning devices; mobiles are short-term memory aids. Yet, nomenclature hasn’t caught up with our response to these digital situations. Whether or not our undertakings are productive, counter-productive, or comical, it’s difficult to address them without a shared language. What is the vernacular of our everyday tasks?

The following is a dynamic dictionary. Feel free to add to the list with your own experiences in the comments!

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Laptop use during a meeting to give the impression of productivity (though really checking email): Frauductivity 

A chorus of vibrating phones during a committee meeting—seemingly having their own conversation: Sub(woffer) Committee

The inability to think of a password that’s eight characters long, contains capitals, numbers and symbols, isn’t a recognizable word, and hasn’t been used before: D1P*Sh1t

Forgetting that password upon login: Impasse Word

Dropping your phone and automatically thinking “command z”: Keyboard Shortcircuit

The frequent interruption of software updates without enough incentive to stop what you’re doing: BURP (Bothersome Update without Real Purpose)

An obsession with red dots (a.k.a. badge app icon): Attention Definite Disorder

Another name for an email signature that lists too many titles, degrees, or awards: Boast Script

An email comprised of ten percent communication and ninety percent repeated email signatures: None-the-less-is-more

The new term for “privacy” where public access of private information is obtainable regardless of password protection or secure servers: Privicly

An acronym uttered by professors to help students disengage from their laptops and pay attention to the presentation at hand: LURN (Listen Up Right Now)

An instructor making a classroom declaration prohibiting phone use, especially during a critique, when the professor’s phone rings: Hypocrit-ique 

The sad decline of salutations on campus sidewalks due to students tuning out with iPhones: iRequited love or Hell-no World

Receiving a text from work after hours (or on weekends) prompting a necessary response: Leisure Seizure

Not being proud of your accomplishments at the end of the day because most of your time was spent responding to emails, texting, or browsing: Gainfully Devoid

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1. Donald A. Norman, Things That Make Us Smart: Defending Human Attributes in the Age of the Machine (Reading, MA: Addison-Wesley, 1993).