08.11.07
William Drenttel | Essays

The Presidential Rash


Lyme Disease. No caption necessary.

[Warning: Another occasional post on Design Observer that involves and invokes political content and satire. Do not read if you do not like your design commentary mixed with politics.]

It was reported this week by the Huffington Post that President George W. Bush has had Lyme Disease since last August — when he got the "characteristic bullseye rash" on his left shin. While millions of Americans have become infected with Lyme Disease, the White House nevertheless decided to keep this information secret for over a year, burying the news in the "past medical history" section of his 2007 physical examination report. (The New York Times reports on his annual check up here without exploring the one-year lapse in public disclosure by the White House.)

So what does a Presidential rash look like, anyway?


Presidential Lyme Disease, left shin, 2006. (Reluctantly released by the White House, 2007.)
A standard Texas bullseye rash might recognize the importance of cattle in Bush's home state.


Presidential Lyme Disease, left shin, 2006. (Reluctantly released by the White House, 2007.)
Lest we forget the Energy Task Force conspiracy of 2001, there is some question as to whether Vice-President Dick Cheney threw away 20 years of environmental caution to support the nuclear power industry in the U.S., 60% of which is built by Westinghouse. Could donations to the Republican Party have lead to a "characteristic Westinghouse rash?"


Presidential Lyme Disease, left shin, 2006. (Reluctantly released by the White House, 2007.)
Who can forget when the Vice President shot his close friend, 78-year-old Harry Whittington? If only Dick had used his scope!


Presidential Lyme Disease, left shin, 2006. (Reluctantly released by the White House, 2007.)
This is totally unfair because Target does so much to support design culture in America. Then again, their executives do give about 80% of their funds to Republicans. Maybe George wakes up with a Target logo on his shin as a thank you.


Presidential Lyme Disease, left shin, 2006. (Reluctantly released by the White House, 2007.)
Last August, George kept saying NO. NO withdrawal from Iraq. NO to Nancy Pelosi. NO to Patrick Fitzgerald. He had to say NO a couple of times to Dick, just to remind him who was in charge. He even said NO to Laura on the evening of August 13, 2006. So who would be surprised that he woke up with the International NO Symbol branded on his leg?


Presidential Lyme Disease, left shin, 2006. (Reluctantly released by the White House, 2007.)
Geroge knew that something was wrong when he saw this symbol pop up in a rash on his leg, but for the life of him, he couldn't figure out what it meant. He asked the Vice-President at their morning breakfast, but Dick just stomped back to his office, leaving the President to eat alone. (George, now confused, emails his trusted Fredo for clarification. A protest rally in front of the White House is broken up minutes later.)


Presidential Lyme Disease, left shin, 2006. (Reluctantly released by the White House, 2007.)
D'oh!


Presidential Lyme Disease, left shin, 2006. (Reluctantly released by the White House, 2007.)
Feeling particularly exuberant and feisty, George takes a shower and discovers the Presidential Seal on his leg. God, he thinks, it's good to wake up in America.

Posted in: Business, Politics



Comments [11]

amazing!
audrey
08.12.07
09:51

Not to take away form the lighthearted political nature of the article, but I'd have to say that Cheney's support of nuclear power is both a positive and negative for enviornmentalists. Whiel there is undoubtedly a lot of scrutiny on nuclear powers possible catastrophe's toward the earth, a few more recent thinkers have said that nuclear power—done safely and collaborativly with environmentalist—may in fact be our best option at weaning our world off of oil.

Stewart Brand (porbably the most outspoken on the topic):
http://neinuclearnotes.blogspot.com/2006/08/stewart-brand-at-nea-2006.html

But perhaps the Westinghouse logo means that PR has GW's ear (or eye) during outbreaks.
Derrick Schultz
08.13.07
03:18

Can we keep the radioactive wastes at your house?
Mark Barnette
08.13.07
09:27

This is not even remotely clever.
Jimmy James
08.13.07
10:36

One might successfully argue that Dubya isn't either.

(At least the article is captioned for the humour-impaired....)
L.M. Cunningham
08.13.07
11:52

Y'know - If you squint and rub your eyes while playing 'Hail To The Chief' backwards, the centre of that rash looks just like Satan (as drawn by Jules Fifer.) ;o)
russellm
08.13.07
11:58

Even by Drenttel's usual political standards, this was pretty lame. Slow post day at the Observer?
John
08.14.07
10:02

Funny. Extra funny!

VR/
Joe Moran
08.14.07
11:22

Can we keep the radioactive wastes at your house?

Mark, if you're willing to house all the Co2 emissions at your place, I think I could take one for the "team." ;)
Derrick Schultz
08.15.07
02:06

Seen the episode of Penn & Teller's bullshit about nuclear power Derrick? Its pretty good.
md
08.15.07
05:18

Oh hey, it's not *that* not funny.
lisa seaman
08.20.07
02:09


Jobs | March 28