The Design Observer annual gift guide!

Just kidding.

This isn’t really a gift guide. It’s just a different way to think about gifts.

The winter holidays are already a tricky time for so many people, though this year feels uniquely fraught. Sorry (not sorry) for the bait-and-switch.

For more than 20 years, the Design Observer community has attracted people — whatever their day jobs — who are dedicated to designing the world we want to live in. “Another world is not only possible, she is on her way. On a quiet day, I can hear her breathing,” says novelist and author Arundhati Roy.

We’ve come to think of our people, of you, as redesigners.

You are many and varied, but all of you leverage your quiet days to find purchase to deliver on the best parts of your jobs: a cleaner and healthier world; a more equitable, efficient, and peaceful society — indeed, a more beautiful one. 

The best part of my job is finding you. 

In the Parable of the Talents, Octavia Butler reminds us, “All that you touch / You Change. / All that you Change / Changes you. The only lasting truth / Is Change.”

Working the way you do, you expect headwinds, of course. But lately, those headwinds have likely picked up speed.

In a culture that measures success by how much we do rather than how much we care, by the things we have and not the depth of our connections, perhaps it’s time to redesign our approach to giving.

A gift, at its best, is a node, a nexus point. Over time, it becomes a trailing indicator of relationship and legacy of — what? That’s the twist: it helps reveal the future you are making now and the ancestor you are set to become.

Since we have a choice, let’s be better ancestors.

As we gather with friends and family — in some cases warily — look for opportunities to hear and share stories with the kinds of gifts that open doors.

Start with the thing-makers: the authors, artists, musicians, designers, and performers — anyone who wrote, made, or produced something that thrilled or intrigued you. Give a gift of the thing they made — support your local indie bookstore, if you can — and share why it meant something to you. Did you receive a gift like this? Something homemade? Ask about it, and really listen.

Turn every gift into story time. Even a small moment can mean so much.

Give a cookbook, and bookmark a recipe you’d like to make together. (Points if you give ingredients, too.) Invent a new holiday ritual and give it a name. Reach out to a long-lost pal. Take a shelter dog for a walk with family. Offer to spell a stressed caregiving friend. Make amends. Write a poem. 

Listen to stories. Share stories. Make new ones. You get the drift.

Designing the world we want to live in is an act of love, faith, and connection, an intentional act of legacy. For the relationships that matter, it’s good to think small. 

But don’t worry, we’ll be tackling all the big stuff again, come January — with a new Design Observer website, new podcasts, and a refreshed newsletter.

On behalf of the enormously talented Design Observer team, we wish you a happy, healthy, and connected holiday season. We are so grateful for our relationships with you. Please tag us on social media; we love to hear your stories.

A version of this essay appears in our flagship newsletters, The Observatory and Equity Observer. Sign up here.